I Don't Bounce, But I'm Part of the Club

For many Mustard Seed Frontline Staff it can be a drag being assigned to screen people as they enter our facilities. The Mustard Seed has a Zero Tolerance policy pertaining to drugs and alcohol. We have staff that ensure that Community Members cannot get in our buildings when they are intoxicated. Our goal with this policy is to maintain a safe environment where our Community can gather without the hazards and temptations of drugs and alcohol.

‘Working the door’ can often be the most stressful job for Frontline Staff. We can often deal with belligerent, intoxicated Community Members who may speak or act in hostile and disrespectful ways. I will say, though, that for every awful interaction we might have at the door, we typically will have dozens of pleasant ones.

I’ll get to my point. Working the door can often feel like working against the efforts we make otherwise to empower, sustain and encourage our community. It definitely feels dreadful to say no or turn someone away. I want to take a moment to reflect on why working the door can be just as lovely and kind as serving in a meal line, or offering someone a change of clothes.

Greeter vs. Bouncer

When I work the door, I choose to be like a Walmart Greeter that loves his job. Have you ever been greeted at Walmart? They actually pay someone to stand near the door and say hello. Now, it definitely feels awkward and contrived when you can tell that the Greeter doesn’t really want to be there. But, when I’m sincerely welcomed by someone with a smile on their face it actually makes me want to endure wretchedly long line ups and crowded aisles. That friendly hello makes me feel like I belong there. Having dinner at the Seed can be just like shopping at Walmart. It’s often overcrowded, bustling and noisy. But, to know that you are wanted and belong can make dinner with strangers feel more like a meal with family.

I’m a pretty big guy. It’s pretty easy for Community Members to mistake me for a bouncer when they approach our doors. That’s why I intentionally choose to be relaxed in my physical stance. Staff at the Seed have training in Non-Violent Crisis Intervention, which can be helpful in high-emotion and physical, conflict situations. But, for the most part we can purposefully take a laid back, yet assertive approach to interacting with the community. Having a willingness to make every effort to talk things out can be one of the best ways to honour and dignify our Community Members. Many of our Community Members have had hurtful experiences with authority figures in the past and can often see us in a similar light if we don’t intentionally choose to be different. I love welcoming people in with a cheerful attitude. I also love de-escalating an intense situation by bringing a calm, kind and thoughtful presence to it. There is a great difference between a bouncer who might physically remove an instigator from a conflict, and Mustard Seed staff who will facilitate reconciliation.

Honorary Club Member

I’ve always been somewhat fascinated by what I refer to as the Smoker’s Social Club. Those that smoke often find themselves outside their place of work, local restaurant or pub sharing cigarettes with friends and strangers alike. Smokers will often entertain casual conversation with strangers they’ve just met, because they needed to borrow a lighter. I’m not a smoker, but standing at the doors of the Mustard Seed I’ve been able to regularly be a part of these conversations that are happening nearby. It seems both strange and wonderful to me that our Community Members are fully aware that my job at the door is to screen them and keep the Seed safe, but they will allow me to be an honorary member of their smoker’s social club. I would like to think that my ability to do my job well is partly due to the respect gained through being social with Community Members at the door. I think that the hard times when I need to turn someone away can be made easier for both me and the community by social rapport being established within the context of smoker’s subculture.

I don’t drink and never have. It’s interesting how this can have an effect on Community Members that know me. Many who have had issues with alcoholism have a great respect for me because of this. I think it can be hopeful for them to know someone who doesn’t ever feel the need to turn to booze to have a good time, or to numb one’s pain. Unfortunately, there can often be a stigma about the homeless being drunkards. It is true that alcoholism is a very real issue in the inner city, but it very rarely prevails completely over anyone. There are a great number of Community Members that I know that I’ve seen drunk occasionally, but sober most of the time. Everyone has their bad days no matter who they are, or what their vice is.

I believe that one of the greatest ways that the Seed can honour Community Members at the door is to turn them away in such a way that they will come back. I aim to never burn bridges with our community. To be able to communicate with our Community Members in a manner that is kind and dignifying allows us to hang on to the rapport we’ve already established even when we can’t let them in for one day. I treasure the moments I’ve had with intoxicated Community Members who I’ve had to turn away, but with whom we shared a laugh anyway and gladly looked forward to seeing each other the next day when they would come back sober.

The Mustard Seed community is enlivening, inspiring and beautiful. We laugh hard together. We cry hard together. We share meals. We chat over coffee. I feel totally privileged to be the one to hold the door open and let people in from the rain and snow. I love being the one to smile and tell someone that it’s good to see them. I am honoured to work the door for the Mustard Seed.