Friday, June 29, 2012

The Gift of Change

The other day I was observing a poverty-related discussion that was happening within a group of my friends. I do this frequently in the hopes that they forget I work where I do, have an honest conversation, and then I can give them my two-cents at the end of the discussion. This particular chat was about panhandling, and how they respond to being asked for money on the street. One friend said that she’s always a ‘sucker’ when she’s asked for change, and will give it to the asker. Another said she will never give to the asker because she’s sure it wouldn’t go towards food or bus fare, and that it would go towards drugs and/or alcohol. I believe this to be the most common view on panhandling. A third friend stepped in with something I hadn’t heard before: “If you give them money and it goes to drugs or alcohol, you’re helping them reach rock bottom and, therefore, recovery, sooner.” I’m sure she was quoting something she’d heard elsewhere, but I'd literally never heard that before and was surprised by it.

Anyway, one question I’m often asked is
 “What do you do (personally) when someone asks you for money on the street?”

Now, I can’t tell you what you should or shouldn’t do, but I’ll tell you my own, personal thoughts on the issue.

Generally, I just say sorry and don't usually give out any change. Why? Probably partly because I’m aware of the services available in our city, all within 2km of where I’m often asked, and partly because I don’t know where the money will go - and sometimes I’m not okay with that. I’m not saying that folks who ask for it are lying to you, but there’s a chance of that. Some might just see it as survival.

Sometimes, I am okay with that. And that’s the key. Each individual needs to decide for themselves if they are or are not okay with what happens to their money after it passes from their possession. If you aren’t, you should stick to donating to an agency you trust. If you are okay with not knowing, then give away! On occasion, if my hand is in my pocket, jingling some change around, I’ll pull it out and hand it to someone. I don’t think about where my money could go, or what rock bottom could or could not be reached because of my paltry contribution. Once that money passes out of your hands, you have to truly let it go. You need to make the decision when you give them the money that you’re truly giving them the money. A gift – and, like any true gift, they receive it and are grateful, and don’t owe you anything.

And maybe, just maybe, by giving them the gift of change, you’ll be giving them … the gift of change.

How do you decide whether to give to a panhandler or not?

- Sarah
Follow Sarah on Twitter @ispeakcanadian

7 comments:

  1. Thanks Sarah!! Man I have this internal dialogue with myself almost every time someone asks me for moula! Usually I just feel rushed and pressured and say no, but lately I've been doing something that has turned out to be REALLY cool. If someone asks me for money because they are hungry, I offer to get them food (if there is something reasonable nearby). I have had some wonderful conversations over a Timmy's, Subway or Mickey D's and heard some pretty eye opening stories.

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    1. I love your response, I think I will try that!

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    2. Alexa, that's amazing! Good for you! You can also carry a couple of $5 gift cards around with you for those times when you feel rushed but do, sincerely, want to ensure someone gets a meal they may need.

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  2. For me it depends on the panhandler - If they are not threatening in any way and I cant see that they are drunk or on drugs then I will quite often give them some change. I live in an area close to a high school and sometimes it is teenagers asking for change to get home. I try to judge where it will be spent on the bus or on 'other' things. My own son panhandled once to get money to get home because a bully had taken his bus tickets...
    There are quite often panhandlers on the corner asking for food or money. I always buy more than I need for lunch and then as I drive by the guy on the corner, hand him the other half of my lunch. You sure can tell if they are hungry from their reaction. It feels wonderful to know that you are truly feeding them. I usually have granola bars and bottled water as well. These items can be life savers as well. Who cant afford a box of granola bars and bottled water?

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    1. Anon,
      That is so great! Good for you for planning ahead! Bottled water is so helpful in the summer months especially. Thanks for commenting!

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  3. The gift of change.I like that :)

    I believe that we initiate the cause by embodying the image we want to effect, and then we pay attention to our intentions..and let go of nay-saying thoughts along the way.

    If we hold true to our intentions during action, (in my case, to show kindness and compassion to someone in need)..then that simple act of love can be received. I try not to attach any "what if" to the gesture. A request for change, can be received as an opportunity to show love.

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  4. I rarely give money to people who are panhandling. Instead I make donations to not-for-profits that provide services for homeless people because those who have been on the street often know where to go to get the help they need. That way they are genuinely being helped.

    I am reluctant to help individuals because there are two men who panhandle by Market Mall (intersection of Shaganappi and 40 Ave) and the University (Crowchild and 40 Ave). They are students who choose to panhandle instead of working and they make quite a bit of money doing it because these are busy intersections. It makes me angry because they are taking money away from people who really need it, simply because these guys don't want to work.

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